If you or someone you know is in crisis: Call or text 988 to reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, available 24/7. Text HOME to 741741 to reach the Crisis Text Line. If there is immediate danger, call 911.
Most people who die by suicide show some kind of warning sign beforehand — but those signs are frequently subtle, easy to miss, or easy to explain away, especially from someone we see every day. Recognizing them early, and knowing how to respond, is one of the most protective things a family member, friend, or coworker can do.
Verbal signs
Some warning signs are direct: a person may talk openly about wanting to die, feeling like a burden to others, or having no reason to live. Others are less direct and easier to dismiss — comments like “everyone would be better off without me,” “I just want the pain to stop,” or “I won’t be around much longer” can sound like venting, but they’re worth taking seriously every time, not just when they seem dramatic.
Behavioral signs
Behavioral changes often carry more weight than any single comment. Watch for withdrawal from friends, family, or activities the person used to care about; increased use of alcohol or drugs; giving away prized possessions; a sudden and unexplained sense of calm after a period of depression or anxiety, which can sometimes signal that a person has made a decision and feels relieved by it; changes in sleep, appetite, or basic self-care; and researching or acquiring means. Recklessness — driving dangerously, taking unusual physical risks — can also be a sign, particularly in adolescents and young men, who are statistically less likely to voice distress verbally.
Situational and mood-based signs
Certain life circumstances raise risk without guaranteeing it: a recent loss (a relationship, a job, a loved one, a sense of identity or purpose), a major health diagnosis, financial crisis, legal trouble, or a history of trauma or previous suicide attempts. Mood-wise, watch for a combination of hopelessness, rage or irritability, dramatic mood swings, and a sense of being trapped — the belief that there’s no way out of an unbearable situation.
No single sign confirms risk, and no checklist replaces a real conversation or a professional evaluation. But a cluster of these signs, especially a change from someone’s usual baseline, is reason enough to act.
What to do if you notice these signs
Ask directly. This is the single most consistently supported piece of advice in suicide-prevention research, and it runs counter to most people’s instinct: asking someone directly whether they’re thinking about suicide does not plant the idea or increase risk. It does the opposite — it opens the door for someone who may have been waiting for permission to say what they’re actually feeling. A direct, calm question (“Are you having thoughts of suicide?”) is more protective than a vague one (“Are you okay?”).
Listen without trying to immediately fix, argue, or minimize. Avoid responses like “you have so much to live for” or “think about your family,” which, however well-intentioned, can read as dismissive of real pain. Stay present, take what they say seriously, and avoid promising secrecy — safety comes before privacy in this specific situation.
Help them connect to support. That might mean calling 988 together, helping them contact a psychiatric provider, or, if there’s an immediate plan and access to means, staying with them and calling 911 or bringing them to an emergency room. Removing access to lethal means during a crisis — firearms, medications, anything specific to the person’s stated plan — is one of the most evidence-backed interventions available, even temporarily.
Ongoing care matters more than the crisis moment
A crisis intervention gets someone through an acute moment; ongoing psychiatric care is what changes the trajectory. At our El Paso clinics, evaluation and treatment planning for depression, anxiety, PTSD, and other conditions that elevate suicide risk include medication management, psychotherapy referrals, and — for eligible patients whose depression hasn’t responded to first-line treatment — TMS (Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation), an FDA-cleared, non-medication option. If you’re worried about yourself or someone you love, reaching out for a full evaluation is a reasonable next step once the immediate crisis has passed.
If you or someone you know is in crisis: Call or text 988, text HOME to 741741, or call 911 if there is immediate danger.